These are the rules for 2016. Heed well.
1. Before you judge harshly, try first to understand.
2. That thing you’ve wanted/meant to do but never did? Do that. Do not sabotage your doing of the thing by waffling about how you’ll try to do the thing, but only if this or that and thus and so happens. Do. The. Thing. Do it.
3. Live your life like it’s set to a soundtrack composed mostly of AC/DC, Led Zeppelin, and Metallica. If this means you trim the hedges with some fucking swagger, then swagger away, son.
4. Kiss like you damn well mean it.
5. Try to say “yes” far more often than “no.” Every once in a while, instead of “yes,” you must instead say, “Fuck yeah,” and, in accordance with rule two above, AC/DC’s SHOOT TO THRILL should be going through your head at that very moment.
6. Laugh a lot. We’ve got one trip through this amusement park. It seems like you’ve got a long time left on the ride until you don’t. Funny shit happens everyday. Laugh. Make someone else laugh. Then laugh along.
7. Keep perspective. That small bore shit that irritates you and sends you over the edge? It is, in fact, small bore. Go hug your kids, or call your best friend, or kiss your spouse/SO. You’ll forget all about it, as you should.
8. And most importantly: Hang the fuck in there. You’re doing fine.