12/5/17

Meanwhile, in the Trump White House pt. V

Another in my ongoing series, “Meanwhile, in the Trump White House:”

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Another in my continuing series….meanwhile, in the Trump White House:

TRUMP: Luther, I’m calling to endorse you.

MOORE: It’s Roy, sir.

TRUMP: Roy? That’s strange.

MOORE: No, not Strange. Moore.

TRUMP: More what?

MOORE: What?

TRUMP: You’re not making sense, Luther. You might as well be CNN, just babbling out fake news. The fakest. Are you fake, Luther?

MOORE: Sir, how can I … Read the rest

10/9/17

Halloween Picture Book

As is my wont each year when Scary Season approaches, I’ll take a moment to remind you that my son and I wrote a beautifully illustrated Halloween-themed children’s picture book (for your Kindle).  It’s called a Not So Scary Halloween Night and you and your kids will enjoy it. 🙂

 … Read the rest

10/2/17

Star Wars: From a Certain Point of View

Hey, a reminder that Star Wars:  From a Certain Point of View releases tomorrow, October 3rd.  Note that proceeds from the book go to First Book, a charity that provides books to children in low income families.  That’s pretty cool.

Also note the talent in that author listing.  Crazy.  And also pretty cool.

I hope you’ll pick it up and I hope you enjoy.  My story is entitled “Sparks” and involves Gold Squadron.… Read the rest

09/28/17

Thoughts on the Middle Class and this Shitbird of a Tax Framework

Couple caveats:

One: I don’t think a tax bill that looks like the Admin’s Framework can get done.

Two: The Framework is missing income thresholds for new proposed rates and for the child tax credit, so some serious unknowns remain.

With those things out of the way:

Are you a married couple who do not itemize (if you don’t itemize, you’re probably not a homeowner)? Good news. The framework “doubles” the standard deduction from $12,800 … Read the rest

09/25/17

Taking a Knee in the Valley of Walking

So one day Bob was walking the Earth. He came to the edge of this glorious valley and really wanted to go inside, but before he could enter, a glowing light formed and this Reified Philosophy/alien being/God appeared before him.

“Whoa!” said Bob.

“Right?” said Reified Philosophy.

Bob put aside his wonder. “Hey, so, I’d really like to walk down into that valley.”

“Of course you would,” said Reified Philosophy. “That valley is the best! … Read the rest

09/20/17

One Upon a Time in Trumpland

A slight variant on my ongoing series, “Meanwhile, in the Trump Whitehouse.:”

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PAULIE WALNUTS MANAFORT: Hey there! I’ve done some work for Russian oligarchs and a pro-Russian Ukrainian party boss. I’ve been paid in cash off the books by mobsters. And I’d like to work for your campaign.

TRUMP: Mobsters are the best! But I don’t actually pay my debts, so hiring someone….

MANAFORT: I’ll work at no charge!

TRUMP: You’re hired!

MANAFORT: Awesome.

Read the rest
03/15/17

Continuum — a short story

Realms of WarContinuum originally appeared in Realms of War (which is now long out of print, never made it into ebook format, and is therefore impossible to find).  It’s an important bridge story between the events of Shadowstorm and Shadowrealm, books two and three of The Twilight War, and also heralds the events of The Godborn, so I thought I’d share it to make it easy for those reading the Cale stories to have … Read the rest

03/7/17

Because Egil is getting whomped in the 2017 Cagematch

The Boys from Dur Follin take solace in their usual fashion, owing to the priest of the Momentary God getting smacked around in the 2017 Cagematch:
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Nix chuckled. “You’re getting walloped, priest.”

Egil grunted. “So it seems.”

“I’m thinking it comes from being the priest of a god no one else worships,” Nix said.

“Bah,” Egil answered.

“Could also be because you’re generally abrasive and mostly unlikable. In truth, I don’t think people

Read the rest
03/3/17

Meanwhile, in the Trump White House (part IV)

Meanwhile, in the Trump White House (part IV):

KUSHNER, out of breath: Sir, Patrick Stewart is coming to the U.S. to fight you.

TRUMP:

KUSHNER: This is bad!

TRUMP:

KUSHNER: He’s Professor X, Mr. President.

TRUMP: That baldy with the Cerebellum machine or whatever?

KUSHNER: Cerebro.

TRUMP: Whatever. Just change the travel ban to keep out mutants. Boom.

KUSHNER: Won’t work, sir. No agent could stop him. He could just implant a suggestion to let … Read the rest

02/9/17

Meanwhile, in the Trump Whitehouse (part III)

In the Oval Office:

PENCE:  Thou hast called for me?

TRUMP:  The Ninth Circuit upheld the ban on my ban!  So lame!  The worst!

PENCE:    No Solomonic tribunal they.

TRUMP:

PENCE:

TRUMP:

PENCE:

TRUMP:  Someone help me here. Steve—

BANNON, clicks heels, raises right arm:  MEIN, FUHRER!

TRUMP:  Jesus H. Sassasfras!  The Merkelese again! Doesn’t anyone speak Americanese in this building?

FLYNN: *raises hand*

TRUMP:  Anyone who is not also creepy? ‘Cause you’re creepy, Mike. … Read the rest